Not been around much lately. I've been busy taking care of Mom, looking up Sunday School lessons, and printing out the kids' homeschool books for next year.
Mom has been ok for the most part, blood sugar dropping a minimal amount of times. Today, she broke my heart though. She asked me, "Where are my kids?" I told her that I was one of her children, and she said, "Where's my house?" I told her that this was her house now. She said, "I haven't lived here forever, have I?" So I explained to her the situation. Again she asked me, "Where are my kids?" Then at that moment, a flash of recognition must have come through, and she said to me...... " I can't remember anything. My memory is gone....I'm not ready for this."
How do you answer to that? What do you say? I told her that I wasn't ready for it either, but by God's will, we have to be. Sometimes, I just want to hold her and tell her everything is going to be alright, and that we'll get through this mess together, just like we always have...together. But yet, I still want her to be my Mommy, the strong, independent lady that taught me everything I ever wanted to know, and everything I ever wanted to be.
I love my Mommy, and I miss her more than anything...
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I have taken on a new task. I am now the Sunday School teacher at our church. The Pastor found out I used to teach, and I was recruited! Thats' ok though, I don't mind! In the same breath, I was also put as coordinator of the Vacation Bible School this summer. *sigh* 
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Well, I guess I had better go so I can finish cleaning up my desk. Hubby foiund my lamp I've been loking for, and I want to get it attached to my desk (it's one of those clip on ones), and clean up my cluttered mess!
I am so sorry to hear about your mother. I can't imagine how hard it must be, to see someone you love so dearly change in such a drastic way. I know you know the Lord will guide you through all this time and I imagine that you will see glimpses of the woman she used to be when she 'comes back'. I will pray for you today and your mother.
ReplyDeleteBlessings,
Chas
Oh my goodness the things we aren't ready for when it comes to taking care of them! And some days, don't you just feel so inept for the job? I do. I worry that things will worsen to the point I won't be able to take care of him, but that his mind will still be there to the point that he knows I've made the decision to place him elsewhere. Oh, how I pray that his mind goes completley before that day comes!
ReplyDeleteAll we can do is one day at a time and one step in front of the other. Take care...